apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

Wipes warmer and the Bumbo seat.
Our friend gave us her Bumbo and then we passed it on to our friend a few months later. Between the 3 babies, the Bumbo has probably been used a grand total of 15 times.

See... the bumbo and the nursing cover were 2 of my most loved items with the 2nd baby. They wouldn't have been used as much with the 1st.

Basinette. We used it for like, five minutes total. It got repurposed as a doll crib when my daughter got older, and was then handed down to a pregnant family member who probably made just as much use of it as we did. ;)

My "must not" list today would be way bigger than my "must have" list. Honestly, the only things we made much use of with our two infants were 1) the carseat; 2) a sling; 3) baby clothes; and 4) cloth diapers. When number two came along, we picked up a double jogging stroller that was invaluable for carting them both around during the summer months. But nearly all of the baby props we received as gifts were either useless, or didn't work nearly as well as you'd assume they would. The swing (which hardly swang but ate batteries like they were going out of style) comes to mine.

1. The infant bathtub. He screamed every time he went in it and bathtime was a nightmare until we just put him in the big tub and now he loves it.
2. Carrier. We got the Tomy freestyle premier and used it zero times. I couldn't get it adjusted to be comfortable and by the time I got myself strapped in, and the baby strapped in, I was too exhausted to go wherever it was I wanted to go.
3. Baby shoes. So cute, but so impractical. He wears the soft booties or socks, but anything else is like bricks on his feet and he's not happy until he kicks them off. We got lots of expensive little Nike trainers and such and he's never even had them on once.

wipe warmer
bottle warmer
anything warmer
portable pacifier germ killer thingy
sterilizers in general (unless necessary for medical reasons)
baby shoes until walking
make-my-baby-a-genius videos
crib bedding sets (you'll most likely get a billion blankets from people)
swing AND bouncy seat AND vibrating playpen, etc
probably a lot of other things

- more than one "cute" outfit in each size
- changing table - we always end up changing them on the floor or a bed

Any clothes received as gifts- no matter how cute the gift giver thinks they are you won't like them as much. And you will already have 47 3-6 month outfits. Before I had kids I used to gift clothes that at least could be easily exchanged. But after returning (no joke) at least 20 outfits to Janie and Jack this year I won't ever do that!

baby shoes-- pointless

-a food mill (they both went from breastmilk exclusively to finger foods or fork-mashed foods from my plate)
-rice/oat cereal for that matter

I agree on the bottle warmer. Pacifiers were also useless for me because my son hated them. We used the Bumbo chair quite a bit. The expensive high chair was the biggest waste. He sat in it for 2 months before refusing to get in it anymore. He loves the cheap Fisher Price booster seat. I wish he could have told me that before I bought the high chair.

Must-Not List:
- wipes warmer
- bottle warmer
- swing
- sleep positioner
- walker
- play pen
- baby monitor
Must Have List:
- BOB jogging stroller
- Britax Marathon car seat
- Kidopottamus velboa snuzzler
- Chamois changing pad cover (at least 2)
- Baby Bjorn active carrier
- Nursing cover
- Huggies diapers
- Robeez
- Bouncy seat w/ vibration
- Anti-bacterial hand cleaner
- Splat Mat for feeding baby

We used our bassinet for 7 months so I think that's a personal parenting style issue. Next time around I'd probably just get a co-sleeper, though. We used a little one that goes in the bed as well as the bassinet. We skipped the Baby Bjorn because I heard it hurts your back so much and went straight for the Ergo. I can't say enough great things about the Ergo. It's not as cute but you can wear it for hours and not feel it. A sleep positioner is useless.

Worst gifts we received were a giant swing, a fancy stroller I didn't choose, an ugly personalized non-returnable toddler rocking chair and 7 different personalized and hideous LL Bean tote bags I had to return. Plus the TONS of not-my-taste outfits mostly in really large sizes I was expected to store and somehow find when baby reaches that age of toddlerhood. It felt like I spent nearly all my free time the first few months returning things. The worst was gifts purchased places in other states or with limited hours. We have a huge Goodwill pile of expensive non-returnable items. If you don't know the people, don't impose your taste with a gift if you really want to be nice.

our must nots:
- electric swing (she hated it, much to my mom's chagrin)
- travel system stroller (clunky, impractical, terrible wheels... gave in and bought a nice jogging stroller)
- baby dvds (we received several as gifts, but I felt queasy about putting the tv on for my infant)

... the baby is 5 months old, and has been using the bumbo endlessly for at least a month... must be child-dependent. We have also come to love our exersaucer, and although she's outgrown them now, we used the bjorn and the vibrating bouncer seat endlessly. We have learned, above all, that our daughter will teach US what she likes, not the other way around. I also love breastfeeding covers - my mom made me several, and it keeps me from flashing the room when the baby unexpectedly pops off to have a look around.

(And: despite all the baby-wipes-warmer disdain out there, we got one as a shower gift and actually appreciated that it made it easier to keep the baby sleepy during those middle-of-the-night diaper changes.. it's become extraneous now, but we loved it for our newborn)

We decided not to buy a basinette. Instead, we got a travel crib that will be used later as playpen. We love it!.
We also love our tub/changing table because it is great for my back and also has racks to store all the baby's stuff underneath.

Hindsight is always 20/20. Even first time parents like me who designed baby gear for a living fall for some of this stupid stuff :) Here's my not to buy list:

-Big SUV stroller of any kind: too bulky, too heavy, too expensive and you'll end up getting rid of it anyway once you have baby #2. That also goes for more than one stroller...you *really* only need one.
-Bumbo: Biggest boondoggle on the planet!
-Leapfrog or Einstein anything

Things that are/were invaluable!
- good breast pump
- nursing pillow
- blankie
- baby books
- Johnson & Johnson Baby Years Book
- well-made umbrella stroller
- spill proof cup
- glider/rocker

Bumbos aren't generally a fave of typically developing babies, but they're AWESOME for babies who are at the age where they really need to be sitting up and learning with their hands and eyes, but they don't yet have the torso strength to be in any sort of upright position. We recommend them for babies in our infant/toddler program who aren't sitting at all by 6-8 months. They provide the exact same support as the $300 adaptive positioning equipment that you can order from the physical therapy supply companies -- they keep the baby upright so s/he can learn, but the baby is still using some amount of torso strength, so s/he is building some muscle tone. The Bumbo also doesn't hold the baby in position by strapping him/her in like many of the (both commercial and adaptive) seats do, so the baby is allowed to use whatever strength s/he has to do things like rotate the torso to reach for toys, look around, etc.

But no, I wouldn't recommend them as a baby gift, unless you know at the time of the gift-giving that someone has given birth to or adopted a baby with atypical muscle tone.

I got a hand-me-down Bumbo from someone whose son hadn't used it much, but it was a big hit for my preemie guy who took some extra time to get the hang of sitting. As eeka said, it gave him the opportunity to experience the world from that perspective when his brain was ready but his torso wasn't there yet.

My biggest disappointments, from a your-baby-may-vary perspective, were the Ergo carrier and Hotsling. I somehow got the Baby Who Would Not Be Worn (and I had plenty of tech support, so it was just a personality thing). I sold the Ergo on craigslist for close to what I paid for it, which lessened the sting a bit.