4 Tips for Enjoying Couple Time

Wise friends of ours told us before having our first child that scheduling in couple time should be a priority. It took a few months of being new parents before we understood the importance of couple time.

As much as we love fingerpainting and Legos, we definitely see the value of having adult time sans the kids. Here is a short list of things we've been doing without the kids to rejuvenate ourselves.

Feathering our nest, literally. We splurged on a new featherbed, duvet, pillows and bedding this weekend. We don't get a lot of sleep so the sleep we do get needs to be peaceful!

Organizing, decorating and repairing the house. Lots of evenings at home means we focus on house projects. My husband and I have decided to make a master list of all of the things we want to do and things that we need to do and start doing them slowly in the evenings after the kids are down. Recent projects have involved: choosing, framing and hanging photos and artwork (although pounding nails into the walls can be a bit loud!); cleaning out closets; and organizing kitchen cabinets.

Preparing meals together. Much of our day is spent answering questions that begin with "why." After the kids are in bed, it's nice to have an uninterrupted adult conversation while cooking our evening meal.

When we feel like seeing friends, we entertain while the kids are asleep. Having young children means lockdown mode after their bedtime so we try to entertain at our house as much as possible.

Of course there are tons of other things you can do outside of your home if you get a babysitter or the grandparents to watch the children. Anyone else want to share some great ideas with us?

Image: Baxterboo.com

you cook and eat dinner after your kids go to bed?

we talk, have sex, fold laundry, maybe check out whatever netflix sent us. we both have little hobbies we like to work at while we chat. the same things we did pre-kids (except for going out!).

posted by doubledutch on November 24th 2009 at 11:23am
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We definitely prioritize our time together after little-one bedtime. We talk, play games, work on projects, have sex, watch the occasional movie together. Sometimes my husband works out in the basement while work on a project and we chat.

The thing we don't do is split kid dinnertime from our dinnertime. There are so many proven relational, developmental, and psychological benefits to having mealtimes together as a family and we work very hard to make sure we eat together almost every evening.

posted by ellenacious on November 24th 2009 at 12:58pm
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Little one eats at 5 PM! So we have "tea" then, and cook and eat a more substantial dinner after she is asleep.

Then we pretty much do the same evening things we used to do pre-baby.

posted by mbm on November 24th 2009 at 1:42pm
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We have five! kiddos 14 down to 4. We really really believe in family dinners, so it is one big dinner when 1) it is ready (ha ha) & 2) when everyone is home. They all snack a little after school (3pm) because sometimes dinner doesn't happen til 6pm.
All are in bed by 9, & supposed to be in-bedroom-by-8:30 so that time is ours....watch something on hulu...enjoy snuggling on the couch...read...dishes...honestly, we are pretty tired by then.
Getting time together & enough can be really challenging.
Hope some more tips come in!

posted by simplertimes on November 24th 2009 at 1:56pm
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Every now and then after our daughter goes to bed, my husband will suprise me or the other way around with a fancier than normal meal. (We'll stop for the ingrediants on the way home from work or sneak something special in the regular weekly shopping.) While one of us is putting our daghter to bed, the other will start cooking. We'll turn off the tv, sit at the table, eat and talk.

posted by ml1003 on November 25th 2009 at 7:46am
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Huh, this is fascinating! On Friday and Saturday nights, we watch something funny on Hulu.

Working on projects side-by-side has a nice healthy sound to it, personal projects that aren't on computers are probably so much more congenial to be around. Knitting and wood carving, maybe we should switch.

posted by p_capucine on November 25th 2009 at 11:38pm
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