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High Chairs or Their Own Table : Where Do Your Kids Eat?

2009-12-04-highchair.jpg

A recent party at a new friend's house led to an interesting topic for discussion. With three young kids, this family had a kid-sized table and chairs set up next to the kitchen table where the children eat their meals together.

 
 

With the exception of when the kids were babies, the kids eat at their own table for all of their meals and snacks. An informal poll of the party attendees revealed about 1/4 of the families have a similar separate kids' table set up. We, on the other hand, have always used high chairs at the dining table. What do you do - high chair, their own table, a combination of both?

Image: Decor8/Elle Interior

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tables, mealtime, dining, highchairs, table and chairs

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Comments (31)

Booster seat at the dining table from 5 months until he outgrew it. Family mealtime is important to us.

posted by DC_Mom on December 4th 2009 at 11:08am
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We have a little table and chair set up in our kitchen where my son eats breakfast, lunch and snacks. Dinner is always at the dining table with the family, either in his high chair or (now that he's getting older) a booster seat.

posted by lisamfb on December 4th 2009 at 11:17am
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Other than the occasional meal where the family isn't eating together, I don't think having a "kids table" is a good idea. Family meals are important in many ways. They promote family communication and togetherness. They teach good eating habits (if the family has good eating habits!) And they provide a sense of tradition, they create a routine to a child's day. Routine is important for children, it makes them feel secure. I'm not saying that all families have to eat all three meals together, it's just not feasible for most people these days. But I believe an effort should be made to eat breakfast or dinner together. Or both, if possible. The cute kids table and chairs can be saved for arts & crafts. Or snacks.

posted by Pencils on December 4th 2009 at 11:38am
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mutsy "grow up" booster seat
http://www.allmodern.com/Mutsy-GUP-X-MUT1157.html
(we didnt get ours here though) and our oldest sits at the table,we have a high chair but really need to get rid of it,no one uses it anymore
~adrienne K~
http://littleakorn.blogspot.com/

posted by adrienneK on December 4th 2009 at 11:45am
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I grew up eating at a separate kids table and I came out of that experience feeling strongly that I wanted my family to eat together as a family. The frequency in which a child eats together with their family has been associated as a protective factor for everything from drug use to grades in school to depression. And even with basic things like table manners, I can speak from experience that the only way I ever learned to function at an adult table was through the weekly dinners at my grandmother's table. I love sitting down with my children for meals. Yes, it's probably somewhat harder to clean up after and our nice dining table has some great fork imprints, but it's more than worth it.

posted by nmoon on December 4th 2009 at 11:54am
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booster at the (family) table until about 18 months. after that, i just put the kids on a chair. that way, it's easier for them to eat at the table without anything special when visiting friends or grabbing a sandwich somewhere. it's not quite as simple as keeping them strapped into a seat (toddlers tend to end up sitting in my lap by the end of the meal) but it works well for us.

at my brother's house, the kids eat with the parents normally, but will eat at the kids' table when there are a lot of people over. i love having my kids eat at their kids' table in the kitchen, rather than over the cream carpet in their dining room!

posted by doubledutch on December 4th 2009 at 12:04pm
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Does anyone know where to get the pendant lamp shown in the picture?

posted by amyamy on December 4th 2009 at 12:30pm
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my dog would absolutely snatch all the food off that short table:)

posted by lnp838 on December 4th 2009 at 12:49pm
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It's never really crossed my mind to have a separate table for kids. My son, 18 months, sits in a booster seat with us at the table.

posted by Edielou on December 4th 2009 at 1:45pm
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I have never heard of having children eat meals at a different table except on holidays when there is just not a lot of room and all the cousins eat together. I find the whole concept odd.

posted by ClothDiaperFashionista on December 4th 2009 at 2:05pm
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We all eat at the same table. Both kids have the kaboost and I love it. I got it as soon as it came out in 2008 and have since bought a second for my daughter as she is finally old enough. I wrote a blog post on it a long time ago. http://laflacad.blogspot.com/2008/03/product-review-kaboost-pics-of-playful.html

I should update it. I took the kaboost with me on vacation this year and it was a lifesaver. So much more convenient then a booster.

posted by LaFlacaD on December 4th 2009 at 2:45pm
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As we do not have a seperate dining room, our dining table is in the main living space. As the kids are still very messy eaters, I prefer they eat in the kitchen at the two-person "lunch counter" for breakfast and lunch. However, we do all eat dinner together at the dining table every night. It is important to strike a balance between eating together --teaching good table manners and conversation skills, and having children eat seperately and gaining some independence. It is very empowering to children to be able to serve themselves from a serving platter, or to pour themselves a refill of milk. It's hard to give them these skills when they are not sitting at a table of their scale, but not impossible.

posted by avimom on December 4th 2009 at 2:53pm
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Our kids ate at a small, separate table in their early years - they had breakfast together and their dinner before we came home for work. We now all sit together for weekend meals and they eat their other meals at the same "grown-up" table. In another year, we will probably move their dinner to a later hour, allowing us all to eat together every night. I think a lot depends on family combos, schedules, etc. My children responded better - "more grown up" - in sitting in a size-appropriate chair than on a booster. If some of the more compact child chairs were more widely available when my kids were younger, than I may have gone that route. But we have twins, and a small table and chairs from Ikea were less expensive than one Stokke chair!

posted by BEmama on December 4th 2009 at 3:01pm
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I'm with those who believe it's important to eat together as a family, and that's what we've always done.

I do find some of avimom's points intriguing, though. I may in fact adopt the "independent" breakfast or lunch as a weekly event or something like that. My three year old would certainly enjoy serving herself. My one year old is not there yet, however. I think in about six months or so I will establish this. Fun idea!

posted by puella on December 4th 2009 at 3:20pm
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Where did the floor lamp come from?? PLEASE... I must know!

posted by Sleek1 on December 4th 2009 at 3:25pm
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I am pretty sure the Floor lamp is Marcel Wanders for Cappellini

posted by amyamy on December 4th 2009 at 3:43pm
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We eat every meal together at the same table -- breakfast, lunch on weekends and non-school days, and dinner every night. Rarely do we ever miss a meal together; we make sure that our schedules are not overcrowded or conflicting. I know the pressures will increase even more as the kids get older, but mealtimes are sacrosanct. It simply feels wrong if we are not all together. Both my 3 and 6 year old are in Montessori, and so they are able to pour milk, set the table, serve themselves, etc. We couldn't imagine putting them at a separate table -- mealtime is when we hear about school, about their dreams, about their friends...

We have a Stokke, as well as an IKEA kids chair, which is smaller with a raised seat.

posted by mschatelaine on December 4th 2009 at 3:58pm
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Eating together thing was a line-in-the-sand thing about family life for us, along with raising our kids to speak both our languages. We both work at home 100% of the time, so we can have goals with meals.

The little table seems to go over really well with kids I know who get to use one at daycare. My daughter would love one, but the rest of our house is set up for her happiness - the table is where she learns to function in an adult world.

That comes from my French husband, I didn't have a formed philosophy beforehand myself!

posted by p_capucine on December 4th 2009 at 4:18pm
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I have one 5 years old sweet child only. She eats lunch & dinner together with us since she was a little baby. We love to continue that tradition even if we have another child.

posted by RKDsign on December 4th 2009 at 9:08pm
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We eat where we feel like it. If that means having a picnic on the floor, we do it. And I eat my lunch with my child at the little people table. I can get my butt on a kiddie seat.

If we have company for dinner, the kids eat together at the small table. I don't care if other people think that's weird. The table we eat at is in the eat-in kitchen, and the little table is right next to it; there's no separation except the carpet line. The kids can have their own conversations and laugh together.

The little table doubles as a snack and craft table. This is the most practical setup for MY house.

posted by stickyricemama on December 4th 2009 at 10:50pm
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My older 2 sit on stools at the counter. The littlest sit in a clip-on high chair between them. It is so easy to clean up! I tried a seperate kiddy table but 1.) Our youngest had the option of getting up and walking around with her food (crumbs everywhere) or leaving it. 2.) the dog snatched her food when she got up. That didn't option didn't work so well!
I've always loved the idea of a "family table" like the other readers here. However, we homeschool and I am with my children 24/7/365. My husband and I like to sit and talk to one another in peace, without interruption over dinner at our table. They're still in the same room, just sitting at the counter (easier to serve them & to clean up) while we sit at the table, the majority of the time.
That's what works for us!

posted by abbygraykit on December 5th 2009 at 12:58am
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For our first kid we had a high chair at the table and believed this was the way!!! The second kid wouldn't sit in it. By the third kid we were in a smaller space and got one of those little hook-on chairs... and the fourth kid we were traveling and he sat in our lap until he was old enough to manage a chair and food at the same time... Never looked back!!! When I think of how many ours my first child wasted sitting in a high chair!!! We eat all our meals at a large table and big guys help little guys and it works for us and no-one is tripping over a high chair or a booster seat and I don't have to have eyes in the back of my head to see what is going on at the kiddy table behind me!!!

posted by se7en on December 5th 2009 at 1:30am
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Does anyone know where the kids table and chairs are from? I love them!

posted by KerriS on December 5th 2009 at 2:33am
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Where is that ottoman from?

posted by busta312 on December 5th 2009 at 2:17pm
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If the kids are at a separate table, how will you ever teach them table manners? I realize this is becoming one of the lost social graces anyway, but putting the kids at their own table seems to be giving up before even starting.

posted by IzzyIzzy on December 5th 2009 at 4:36pm
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I have no children yet, but have given the topic consideration. As a child we always had breakfast and dinner at the table, and had to use our utensil correctly, say "please", "thank you", and "may I be excused" when we were done eating. I don't remember talking about school or drugs at the dinner table. I do remember holiday dinners the kids got to sit at their own table, and that was always such a treat (we could play with our food then!). However, I visited some friends in France who have 4 children. They first fed their children and then sent them to bed, and had their own private, quiet dinner and a glass of wine. I really liked the idea of maintaining the romance even in a busy family. I think good parents are going to find the time to connect with their children on a regular basis no matter what. I guess my final conclusion is that regular meals together are still important, but maybe having a couple of days a week where the parents get to have a private meal, or the kids get their own table and time could be really fun.

posted by darcitananda on December 5th 2009 at 8:56pm
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However, I visited some friends in France who have 4 children. They first fed their children and then sent them to bed, and had their own private, quiet dinner and a glass of wine.

That happens in the US, too. Family time is family time, no doubt about it, but couples also need their private time. Couples who say they don't miss their before-kid dinners with adult conversation are lying.

posted by stickyricemama on December 6th 2009 at 3:34am
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The kid's table and chairs are Wegner

posted by amyamy on December 6th 2009 at 11:47am
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..they're Wegner, hand-made in Denmark, and around $1800 for that configuration. They are called "Peter's table" and "Peter's Chair" and were a christening gift from Hans Wegner for his friend Borge Mogenson's son Peter in 1944. Because it was war-time, Wegner couldn't find a suitable present, and so designed and built something himself.

The chair is extremely well-designed for young children, but it is waaaaay out of our price range...

http://www.danishdesignstore.com/products/ch411-childrens-table-by-hans-wegner

posted by mschatelaine on December 7th 2009 at 3:55am
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As someone else mentioned before it never occurred to me either to have a separate table for kids except during parties or holidays.

Growing up always had dinner (and usually breakfast) with family. I intend to continue this with my own family as well. My daughter is 10 months and we all start dinner at the same time though we usually break to put her to sleep and finish the rest of it when she's down.

posted by kpbittner on December 7th 2009 at 11:23am
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>>couples who say they don't miss their before-kid dinners with adult conversation are lying
Don't accuse people of lying. I wanted to have children so that I could be with them. My husband and I manage to have adult conversations all day long, I don't see why they necessarily have to be over dinner. We do, however, go out to dinner sometimes alone as a couple. Also, I don't want to eat so late that it's after the kids are in bed--I do believe that kids should go to bed fairly early, but I don't like eating at 8 or 9pm unless it's a special meal out (and even then I get hungry and need to eat something to tide me over.)

posted by Pencils on December 7th 2009 at 2:39pm
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